Sunday, January 28, 2007


Last night I watched "The Prestige" and it was a highly fascinating movie. Without revealing too much of the plot, the basic gist of the movie is two magicians who were once friends and are now rivals trying to out-do each other and get each other back for past wrongs.

The two magicians have two obsessions: figure out how the other does his illusions and out-do him, and exact revenge for whatever wrong was last commited by the other. In the process of living out these obsessions, the two magicians ruin their families, lives and careers.

Maybe there was something to when God said, "revenge is mine." Maybe in the process of trying to prove ourselves right, we ultimately end up damaging ourselves most of all.

Bono once said something to the effect of, "most of the world believes in karma, but I believe in grace, because I'm utterly dependent on it." I think the essence of that statement speaks a relevant truth: we should be more obsessed with grace than with revenge.

If you take the time to think about times when others have hurt you, I'm sure that things will come to mind. But, if you think about the times when you have hurt others, it probably is a much longer list. So, when you think about revenge and justice, maybe it's not such a good thing...

Maybe you are more utterly dependent on grace than you realize.

Monday, January 22, 2007


Do you ever think that maybe the person you lie to most is yourself?

This thought is the culmination of various random conversations I've had over the past little while.

- A debate about the Christian music industry.
- A discussion board topic in which Christians started an argument with those who didn't share their faith.
- A discussion about the roots of Christianity.
- Reading the lyrics from the song of a guy who sent me a message through mySpace.

The final one was the clincher. I can't remember the artist's name, and I didn't read the lyrics thoroughly, but the gist was that the artist was doubting if there was a God because of the hurt he'd experienced.

For me, God has always been a given. I really have been going to church since before I was born. (Since my mom went, and I was inside her.) Growing up in Sunday School, they don't really expose you to atheistic views. And all through the years, I was a devout church-goer, youth-group-attender.

That's my background. And, just to set the record straight, I absolutely believe in God, and I believe the Bible is God's Words to me.

But I don't think it ends there. I think that being real with ourselves and real with God should be an ongoing part of our lives. God never intended for us to read the whole Bible, believe that He exists and then go on with our lives, blindly trusting Him.

Abraham had a child with his wife's maidservant because He didn't think God would provide him with a son through his wife. But he kept talking to God, and eventually his wife became pregnant. Abraham was called the "father of many nations" and is an epic character in the Bible.

Jacob wrestled with God. Can you believe that someone had the nerve to wrestle with God? Guess what happened... God changed his name to Israel, and he became the father of the very nation that still exists to this day.

Peter denied Jesus. When Jesus needed him most, he told everyone that he didn't know Jesus. Fifty or so days later, he was risking his life preaching to over 2000 people.

These are just a few of the stories of people who lived lives of examined faith. They struggled and wrestled and screwed up, but God rewarded them for having the courage to do so.

One of the things that bothers me most about Christians today is that we accept what we know, pocket it into our minds, and go on with our lives. We're afraid to hurt, afraid to doubt, afraid to question.

But God wants us to be honest. Sometimes we can honestly say that things are hunky dory. But sometimes they aren't.

Be real with yourself. Be real with God.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Why Does Nobody Tell Them?

Tonight was the season premiere of American Idol.

It's not a show that I've ever really followed, but I find the auditions to be incredibly amusing. And usually I miss them, but today, because it was supposed to be a Gilmore Girls night, I found myself at the TV and lucked out.

Tonight I learned something about truth - it's a good thing. There were a great many people who found themselves on national TV tonight who probably wished that someone would have told them.

Take, for example, the juggling/dancing/trying to sing boy. He sang a very off-key rendition of some very old Michael W Smith song WHILE doing the juggling sticks thing. His voice was awful. Did no one hear him sing? Was there no one in his life who had the heart to tell him maybe he should stick with something else?

Then there was the Wizard of Oz girl. She had a poster of the Yellow Brick Road and did some weird lion thing. Did no one see her making the poster? A sibling? Parent? Roommate? Was there no one in her life who could tell her that she should just sing a normal song?

And finally, one of my personal favourites, an American Idol superfan. She was a vocal performance major in college, and for her song, she chose to sing "Under Pressure." Yes, the song by Queen and David Bowie. Why, oh why, did no one suggest an alternative?

There is no way to determine why each of these people managed to get on TV to make embarassments of themselves. Perhaps they had some filtering people in their lives and simply chose to ignore them. Maybe we should look inwardly and see if there is anything that is turning off those filters in our own lives.

Tonight I have no answers. Just questions.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Head Over Heels

Head Over Heels (In This Life)

Head over here and take me
Head over heels and aching
When I told you I was yours
I was yours

In this life, you’re the one place I call home
In this life, you’re the feeling I belong
In this life, you’re the flower and the thorn
You’re everything that’s fair in love and war

I’m coming down like a gunshot
In all these battles I’ve fought
You’re the mark I’m aiming for
I was yours

Head over heels

In this life I’m stubborn to the core
In this life I’ve been burning after more
We both know what these open arms are for
You’re everything that’s fair

In this life, you’re my only one


These are the lyrics from the song Head Over Heels from the latest album by Switchfoot, Oh! Gravity.

They are taken directly from

Monday, January 08, 2007


Ever since a telemarketer pulled me from the middle of my REM sleep this morning, I've felt tired.

There are about 85 minutes until the official start of my very last semester of school. Instead of relishing in the freedom of 85 minutes with no textbook readings, assignments, studying or group projects, I have an extra curricular project which I must scramble to finish.


Maybe I'm not so much tired as I am wishing I could find out how my dream ended.

Stupid telemarketers.